God’s Day Out
05/11/08 - NMB


I was whiling away the day
At the Your Big Picture Cafe
Just enjoying a few beers
When there suddenly appeared
Right out of thin air
Someone sitting next to my chair
So I turned my head to see
God staring back at me
Saying sailor have you got a light
And if you think this is queer
Then buckle up my dear
Cause it’s gonna be a bumpy night

Cause god’s a
Hermaphroditic, narcissistic
Gender bending, solipsistic
Southern baptist jew
Who likes to hang out with mohamed
Read the koran and kabalah
With buddha and krishna too
God’s working 24/7
Taking orders up in heaven
From the vatican and ebay goons
Saying please give it a rest
And clean up your own mess
Cause I need a vacation soon

And I said God this is so cool
To be sitting next to you
I can’t believe that you’re really here
But God said keep your pants on son
Cause this won’t last very long
I’m only here for one or two beers
You see it’s so screwed up upstairs
That when I spend a day down here
It all goes to hell and back again
Then I must stay up all night
To figure out who has been nice
And who’s committed sin

Cause god’s a...

Then I said God what do you mean
I thought that we were in your dreams
And the apples of your eye
But god replied
You’re not too bad
Yet it really is quite sad
How you’ve turned out after all I’ve tried
And suddenly I realized
That maybe something was awry
And things weren’t quite what they seemed
So I burst out into tears
And said god I am so scared
That you’re no longer in love with me

And god said oh my dear child
Seems your brain’s stuck in idle
From all the lies you’ve been told
You’ve shrouded me in mysticism
And killed yourselves over religion
So if I may be so bold
While I care for you it’s true
I care for everything else too
And your big bang theory’s unclear
You see I was eating baked beans
When I farted and it seems
That’s how you all suddenly appeared

Cause god’s a....

So I was whiling away the day
At the You Big Picture Cafe
Just enjoying a few beers
When suddenly there disappeared
Right back into thin air
The god who had once been there
So when you’re nothing more than gas
You can bet your sweet ass
These experiences never last
So if you ever should see god
Remember it’s not odd if god
Sticks you with the bar tab

Cause god’s a...

And if you don’t listen to me
Well you just wait and see
I’ll make george bush
President
Permanently


chords:
A - E
A - Bm
D - A - F#
Bm - E - A


copyright 2008 Robert Ben Mitchell, all rights reserved.